Posts tagged funny

Parsnip

Parsnips a Plenty!

1
4 months ago
by Rae in , ,

So my first real memory of the delicious root vegetable known as the parsnip happened when I was watching Homestar Runner back in 2002 or 2003. There was this great old timey short called “Parsnips-a-Plenty” that I watched and it made me wonder… what do parsnips taste like?

Well, the best way I can put it is this: parsnips are what would happen if a potato and a carrot made sweet, hot, somehow forbidden, dirty love to one another and produced an heir to their mutual awesomeness.

Parsnip

Love Child...

Today, I’m going to give you a 4-fork recipe (That’s like 5 star!) from Epicurious.com.

Roasted Parsnips with Parsley

Ingredients
2 pounds medium parsnips, peeled, cut on diagonal into 1/2-inch-thick slices
2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
1 teaspoon coarse kosher salt
2 tablespoons (1/4 stick) butter (or Ghee if you’re watching your casein intake)
2 teaspoons finely chopped fresh Italian parsley

Preparation

  1. Preheat oven to 450°F.
  2. Toss first 3 ingredients in bowl.
  3. Spread parsnips in single layer on rimmed baking sheet, and dot with butter.
  4. Roast parsnips 20 minutes.
  5. Using tongs, turn parsnips; roast until browned and soft, about 15 minutes longer.
  6. Transfer parsnips to plate and season to taste with salt and pepper.
  7. Sprinkle with parsley.
  8. Serve and Enjoy! :)

Parsnips are great pretty much wherever you’d want a milder carrot or a sweeter, crunchier potato. My grandma used to put them in her matzo ball soup, I hear. Last night we had some in our chicken soup, and it came out great!

What are some of your favorite parsnip recipes?

To All You Productive Motherfuckers Out There: I Salute You!

0
11 months ago
by Rae in

In Other Words: Happy Father’s Day!

My favorite pictures with my dad are the ones where we’re both smiling and flipping off Mom behind the camera.

And even though he’s on the opposite side of the country (which may as well be the other side of the world), and we’re not talking to one another, I have to say, rather proudly, in fact: I came my attitude honest.

This Father’s Day, I am grateful for the gifts of Pat Benetar, Jethro Tull, Styx, and Boston being consistently played in my father’s car stereo. For hours of giggling uncontrollably at a toy purchased at Spencer’s Gifts called “The Final Word” that taught me the phrase, “Eat Shit and Die.” which was, of course, only to be used in traffic (with closed windows!), and for his bleeding-edge tech geekery, which meant that I was privileged to learn on top-of the line equipment from such a young age, I never knew how special and amazing a gift that it was until I was an adult… which lead to me thinking, for a little while there, at least, that my shit didn’t stink. (Good thing I grew up! Nothing stinks like unacknowledged privilege.)

To all the fathers out there, taking care of of your children: remember, they’re only kids for so long! Take an interest in who they are and what they want to do. You’d be amazed how one afternoon can make a lifetime memory. Your children are not actually interested watching you play video games. They just want to spend time with you. Interact with them! You can make all the difference in their world.

Here they come, here come the seizures!

0
3 years ago
by Rae in
Speed says, Always wear your helmet! Especially when watching my movie!

Speed says, "Always wear your helmet! Especially when watching my movie!"

Oh hubris, thy name is Speed Racer!!!
First of all, let me say that I acknowledge how absurdly stupid this move was… and yet, I was compelled. It was as if I were challenging my seizure disorder to a duel…
Anyway – last night, Adam and I headed over to rent some movies, and we picked up Speed Racer, mostly as a joke, since we both liked the cartoon as kids. I figured, “Sure, this would have given me seizures in the movie theater, but SURELY not on our TV set. Besides, I haven’t had any real seizures in almost a week!”
HUBRIS, I TELL YOU! THE PRIDE BEFORE THE FALL!!!!
Not 10 minutes into the movie, and I was quakin’ like the San Andreas fault. I honestly haven’t had seizures that strong or that lasted that long in MONTHS. I’m talking post-hospital strong.
Sadly, I actually *wanted* to watch this movie — and now that I’ve seen some of it, I know that I would end up probably liking it because it looked so true to the style of Japanese animation while still being primarily live action. It was actually pretty awesome — not to mention there were some very cool visuals (though I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone who has decided to partake in any kind of hallucinogenic drug). Of course, ultimately the ability to watch the movie was surpassed by the aforementioned “awesomeness” of colors and motion. Shiny stuff is my kryptonite.
READERS, LET THIS BE A LESSON TO YOU! It’s one thing to have your seizures under control in normal circumstances. It is quite another to watch Speed Racer.
This public service announcement is brought to you by stupidity, boredom, pride, and the letter Y. Not as in, “Y not?” but rather “Y GOD Y!?!?!” and, as always, the sponsorship of Readers Like You. ;)
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